Category: 2019 Taco’s & Toucan’s

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ANTIGUA – Sacatepéquez, GUA

My Copa Airlines flight CM321 departed Havana on time at 8:45 AM and landed (with spontaneous passenger applause too I might add) at Panama City’s Aeropuerto Internacional de Tocumen at 10:30 AM, which is precisely the time when they are boarding flight CM544 to Guatemala City.

As luck would have it, my incoming flight gate is at the opposite end of the airport, so I have to hustle the entire length of the joint …. and all travelators are not operational – go figure. I get to my gate and slip straight on to the ½ full flight to find a little kid sitting in my seat. I show what looks to be the accompanying mother of the child my ticket and seat number 10D, but she just shakes her head and ignores me. I get the attention of a trolley dolly who tries to seat me in the “shit house” seats i.e. the very last ones that rest up against the cattle class toilets and rear galley. I decline the offer.

It wasn’t until a Spanish speaking woman comes up and wants her 10F window seat in the same row that I have the disputed aisle seat, that the hostess asks the woman for her boarding pass. The woman rolls her eyes, huffs & puffs and makes a big show of not being able to find her boarding passes, meanwhile my new row-mate and I are performing the airline seat-swapping dance trying to not block the remaining passengers from getting to their seats.

I come to find out during the flight that it wasn’t until the Cabin Manager came up and threatened to offload the mother and her two kids, as they are required to have their boarding passes available upon request, that they were produced. You wouldn’t read about it – I watched the hostess walk the trio to the very last low of seats on the plane.

We arrive just on 1PM at Guatemala City’s Aeropuerto Internacional La Aurora, spend over an hour clearing Immigration and then play the Guatemalan Customs “Ring A Bell And Win A Prize” game in which I declared I had prescription medications, a pocket knife, scissors and a piece of artwork. The attending officer takes a disinterested glance at my Customs Declaration, then asked me to push the button on her workstation, that would illuminate a large red or green light, thus randomly selecting you for further investigation. I went “Green means Go” and was outta there like an Ethiopian after a chicken before anyone had second thoughts. The American Airlines pilot behind me wasn’t so lucky, he not only got the big red light, but also copped the loud obnoxious fail buzzer sound as well.

My final destination for the day would be Hotel Posada De Los Bucaros, located in the adjoining town of Antigua, that according to my transfer driver, on a good day would take under an hour. Today wasn’t my day it seems, as it took just over 2 hours in bumper to bumper traffic to cover the 41 kilometre (26 mile) journey. Not that I had a care, I just took it all in from the co-pilots seat.

I got my accommodations sorted and hit the streets with the intention of securing some of the local Guatemalan Quetzales (GTQ) currency, which currently runs 5.35 to the AUD or 7.645 to the USD. This turned into a bit of a mission as either the ATM’s would only allow 200 GTQ – if they had currency available, that’s if the ATM was working at all. The bank was a no-go as it had a queue for Africa at 15 minutes to closing and I didn’t have my passport to proceed with any transaction. In the end I settled on taking what was available – 200 QTC’s, and will sort it out on Monday.

My hotel supplied walking map which listed the Hotel Posada de Don Rodrigo as a local dining option. Its non-descript unassuming hole-in-the-wall façade gave no hint as to the how large, intricate, ornate and old the actual building is.

I found my way to the dining facilities, that are literally hidden away in the rear corner of site, was seated with an ice cold Gallo cerveza and took in the available surroudings with the varied menu.

Alas, I could not make my mind up with so many good looking options. Time to enable my back up plan. I resorted to my usual fall-back position and simply asked for the Chef to choose for me, and hand on heart, I was not disappointed in the slightest.

A starter consisting of made-from-scratch asparagus soup with a fresh tomato & chilli salsa picante got the meal going. A stuffed pork Chile Relleno with homemade chicken chorizo sausage, guacamole, rice, bean paste and the best tortillas I’ve had in a long while. It was an awesome way to top off a long day.

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PANAMA CITY – Ciudad de Panamá, PAN

My 3AM start to the day came about because I was sharing a transfe service with both Andrea (an Advertising Exec from Melbourne, Australia) and Gretta (Sports Science professional from Mildura, Australia) who were on the 7:30 AM flight to Toronto, Canada.

I actually had an 8:30 AM departure for Panama City and then on to Guatemala City, but waiting at the casa or at the airport is still killing time by any measure.

It took ½ an hour to get to the airport, then a 2 hour long Copa Airlines queue to get checked in and a mad dash though Customs & Immigration to say goodbye to Gretta and Andrea whose flight was in final boarding.

With having a little bit of time and similar to my leaving Mexico on this trip – what did I think of Cuba?

Cuba is an interesting mix of unique historical activities, elements, political & religious interference as well as armed incursions, that have shaped the country into what it is today. It’s a mix of failed Communism ideals, that have morphed into semi-Socialism with a dollop of fast spreading capitalism to spice up the mix.

Whilst people who are used the government either providing or heavily subsidising everything, the prevailing government recognizes they cannot afford to continue that way. Having said that, the ruling elements have identified tourism as the catalyst for getting the country back on its feet, but they are fast realising they have to relinquish their control of everything – hence the two local currencies as well as the free, grey and black market economies.

A couple of interesting observations:

  • Not every Cuban has a stogie or Cohiba hanging from their lips. Whilst there looks to be proportionately more cigar smokers than you’re used to, it’s simply too expensive for the local to buy the top grade cigars.
  • There is a tremendous amount of rice consumed in Cuban dishes. Similarly, there is a lot of plantains on the table as well.
  • Alcohol is cheap: Decent local cervezas run you $0.90 to $1.25 USD for a can or stubby. Rum can be had for $3 USD for a litre of what I call cocktail starter, with the decent rums $5-15 USD a litre for your smooth sipping pleasure.
  • Water on the other hand can cost you anywhere from $1.00 – $3.00 USD for a 1.5 litre bottle, depending on which government run un-super market or local owner kiosk you purchase it from.
  • It is expected that you pay $0.25 to $1.00 USD for every visit to the toilet in any public area – even your own hotel, and best you bring “Poo Tickets” as that can be scarce in many places.
  • If it has wheels and moves in Cuba, then it’s a human transport device and potential revenue generating facilitator. Horse, cart, bicycle, bus, truck car or tractor – it doesn’t matter how you travel, as long as you’re not walking by the looks of it.
  • Female government workers and school girls uniforms looked to have been designed by a male adolescent schoolboy – the skirts and shorts are seriously length deficient.
  • Local casa stays are awesome. You get to hang with the locals and get an instate to how their housing and daily life goes.
  • Communication for me in Cuba was not a major issue as with hand signals, “SpanGlish”, pointing and the fun game of “chatting with charades”, we seemed to sort out what was needed

I have to say that regardless of where I went throughout the island, the people were warm, friendly and very accommodating, which speaks volumes considering the adversity the nation has been through and continues as part of everyday life.

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HAVANA – La Habana, CUB

Today is my penultimate day in not only Havana, but also Cuba and we had a few things scheduled with the crew like cruising in 50’s convertibles, visiting Old Town Havana, a bit of a walkabout and a farewell dinner.

My first task of the day was to checking to see how our CEO – Victor, is travelling. His mum had cataract surgery rescheduled several times during the past couple of weeks, but today was the day. Like any good kid, you want to be there in support, but like any adult – work generally find a way to impede. Not a lot we can do other than be there for him and keep his mind off worrying about it, but sometimes it’s simple a matter of a sympathetic listener that can help the most. With the promise of regular “mama” updates, we set off for the day.

We spent a good hour travelling around in 50’s classic convertible cars. My ride was a pink & white 56 Chevrolet with ancient three cylinder Yanmar marine diesel motor, that sounded like an old chaff cutter with a stutter. Everything else in the vehicle was “Cubano original” in that it was kept running with ingenuity, bush mechanics, a big dose of luck with a prayer or three thrown in for good measure – but that was all part of the charm. I loved the experience.

We took in such sites as the tallest church in Cuba – Iglesia Del Sagrado Corazon de Jesus (known locally as the Church of Queen), the Plaza de la Revolución (Revolution Square) which is the 31st largest city square in the world, measure 72,000 square meters (18 acres) and includes the Memorial a José Martí as well as the Camilo Cienfuegos Gorriarán and Ernesto “Che” Guevara steel images that are mounted to multi story buidings.

Cruising out to the Meliá Cohiba, then turning right to drive the oceanside Malecón (officially Avenida de Maceo) was a bit of fun before ending the cruise at the $440 – $1355 USD a night Gran Hotel Manzana Kempinski La Habana.

With no wheels, it was “foot falcon” time where we’d simply wander around Old Town Havana. I decided to pull the pin just before lunch at the El Gallo Y La Muyer (Old Town Square), as my back was playing up. While the crew headed off to a Tapas Bar for a nosebag, I headed back to the casa for a hot shower and a lie down to ease the discomfort.

I also took this opportunity to spend a couple of hours sorting out my gear for an early departure, before meeting up with Sarah, Chris “Sexy Time” and my roomie Derrick for a couple of pre-dinner Mojito’s at El Chanchullero.

The whole crew met up at the main casa, wandered over to MeKeDé Bar & Restaurant for our farewell dinner that was accompanied with falling rain and unintentional tossed prawn main course, that was something out of Fawlty Towers. A few speeches, numerous H&K’s and more than a few Hasta Luego’s before we dropped most of the group off at the Buena Vista Social Club show and heading to mi casa.

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HAVANA – La Habana, CUB

Today’s scheduled highlight was a drive out to the area made infamous by the failed CIA backed Cuban exile armed Bay Of Pigs Invasion. More expressly it was the Museo Giron where the Cubans have created a museum proclaiming the victory over the “CIA supported bandits”.

To be honest, I struggled with the visit due to the seemingly one sided commentary, that lays the blame for the Bay Of Pigs armed action squarely at the feet of the United States. Contrastingly, history has shown the Soviet superpower was pulling strings and supplying arms and intelligence from the shadows, but the only mention of any Russian influence was that of students manning newly delivered Soviet artillery weapons during the action.

The adage of “to the victor goes the spoils” and “the conquerer writes their own history” seems to hold some sway with a few sites I’ve visited so far, but Cuba is certainly not alone in the that endeavour.

Just after 11 we pulled up at the oceanside facility of Caleta Buena, where for $15 USD you get a buffet lunch and a free drinks selection of 4 cocktails, tap Cristal cervesa, soft drinks and water.

It was looking to be 3 hours of my life I’d love to get back, as I’m so not a big fan of lying out on a sun bed or snorkeling along with dozens of bus loads of other quickly burning “rock lobster rubber-neckers“.

But after updating my Blog, partaking in a pretty ordinary buffet lunch, I grabbed my camera and went exploring the pocket bay, that makes up the site and I’m sure glad I did. I found a cenote (sink hole/rock pool) that measures about 20 metres (60 feet) in diameter where you could swim with a large amount colourful tropical reef fish.

A 3½ hour bus ride into the nation’s capital – Havana, saw us arrive back in my original Casa from a fortnight ago, but not before stopping at the road sign announcing our arrival in Australia. Why yes, there is a settlement named Australia, which is somewhat unique as all other Cuban towns were named by the Spanish, except for Cienfuegos, which was named by the French Haitian immigrants.

After a quick freshen up and getting some laundry sorted, it was a few drinks at El Chanchullero with my roomie Derrick, before dinner at D’Next Bar & Cafeteria with the crew, where I had my first Cuban double meat patty burger, with the lot, including two fried eggs ….. and it was all sorts of ooiest-gooiest awesomeness.

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CIENFUEGOS – Cienfuegos, CUB

As it’s only an hour and a half to our next overnight stop at Cienfuegos, we scheduled a 2PM departure which allowed us all morning to wander around Trinidad.

After hitting the “Hole In The Wall Gang” i.e. an ATM, for hopefully the last time in Cuba, my room mate Derrick and myself had to return to the very same bank and spent over an hour exchanging the 100 and 50 Cuban CUP peso notes. No one would take them as payment due to them being too large a bank note.

With the finances all sorted, we headed over to the main casa to see if anyone else was around. With no one in sight, we headed off over to the crafts market for Derrick to try and locate a dominos set.

We pulled up at the Plaza Mayor for a morning tea cerveza and ran into a few of the crew, did another lap of the crafts market for one of the girls looking for Canchánchara cups and settled on lunch at Cubita’s, where all 7 of our meals were great.

2PM on the dot and we were out of Trinindad and headed to Cienfuegos, the so called “Pearl of The South”, which is the only settlement in Cuba that was not established by the Spanish. French immigrants from Haiti established the port town and it shows in the architecture, wide boulevards and promenades.

Apparently no visit to Cuba is completed without a visit to “the most romantic Cuban house” – the Palacio de Valle. As the story goes, the Moorish inspired 3 story building was a symbol of a Spanish merchants love for his wife. He ran a competition in which he combined several architects entries to have the building we have today.

It costs you $4 USD to visit the top floor open balcony, in which you receive a complimentary drink. Unfortunately, it does not appear that any of the entrance money is being spent on maintenance, which is unfortunate and the work that has been done, resembles a toddlers finger-painting in both execution and end finish.

As with most romantic love stories, this one also has a happy ending. After two years in the house, and with the wealthy merchant not being so wealthy after a downturn in sugar pricing, she left him and returned to Spain, presumingly living happily ever after.

Dinner tonight was our last with our driver “Beef Steak” as when he drops us off in Havana tomorrow, he will be on another tour. We ended up in the cramped environs of a converted house that is Restaurante Bahia where the food was good, but the service requires some attention. At the end of the meal Andrea and Natalie presented “Beef Cake” with a photo they took of him driving the bus, while I gave him something that he says aids him in his domino playing – a carton of Cristal cervezas.

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TRINIDAD – Sancti Spiritus, CUB

With today being a free day, most of the group were off either hiking to a nearby waterfall, cruising around on a local catamaran or on a scheduled local tour. Myself and Sarah, a rock licker (Geologist) from Perth, Western Australia decided to meander around town on our own.

We visited the local crafts markets, joined a free city walking tour for a bit, before breaking away for an awesome lunch at the Cubita Santander. A couple of Cristals and a chinwag at the Casa De La Cerveza (House of Beer) and we were back on the streets exploring Trinidad.

We happened upon a couple of galleries which had some stunning artwork on display. I don’t do the whole ‘trinket & t-shirt’ souvenir bullshit thing, but I will purchase artwork, which was the case at Galeria R-Evolucion which features the work of the owner Rafael Alvarez Alonso.

After a second visit to Casa De La Cerveza, Sarah and I returned to the Main Casa to meet up with the rest of the group for our included Salsa dance class. As there were ½ a dozen of us who were not interested in the Salsa lesson, I arranged for Ronaldo to come back instruct us on the art of making a Mojito, a Daiquiri and a Canchánchara as we obviously failed yesterday’s class.

Dinner was held just a little out of town at a place called Restaurante La Marinera whose specialty is seafood and while most of the group decided to continue on at a local nightclub – Discoteca Ayala (The Cave), that is situated in a huge subterranean cave, I on the other hand decided it was best to check my eyelids for holes.

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TRINIDAD – Santci Spiritus, CUB

All of us were up and out of the Hotel Colon before 9AM as we had scheduled a bicycle taxi tour of old town Camagüey.

I have to say outside of staying in The Underground Hotel in Coober Pedy, this is the first hotel I’ve stayed slept in that’s had no windows at all – kind a weird ….. or did they re-purpose a broom closet, because the room sure felt that way.

In just on a hour, we got to see a few of the city’s historical sites like Plaza de los Trabajadores, Teatro Principal de Camagüey and the gallery and street sculptures of renowned local artist Martha Jiminez.

It was then a 3 hour bus ride into Sancti Spiritus where lunch was meant to be a Serrano Ham sandwich at the Taberna Yayabo, which turned into a 2 hour ordeal in which you got two one inch thick slices of dried bread with bacon like pork meat and sweaty cheese for $8 USD that could be best described as a shit sandwich without the bread.

The rest of the afternoon was filled with the 1½ hour drive into Cuba’s third oldest city – Trinidad.

After freshening up, we all met back at the main casa – Casa Anay y Jesus for Ronaldo to both instruct and allow us hands-on tutoring in the making of a Mojito, a Daiquiri and a Canchánchara, which I might add, was a hell of a lot of fun.

Dinner was a group affair at the main casa before quite a few of us headed out to a local square which was pumping with locals bands at Casa de la Música.

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CAMAGÜE – Camagüe, CUB

It just so happens that the start of my second week in Cuba corresponds with the worst night sleep for the entire trip so far. Yeah, self-inflicted no sympathy you may say, but if you ever taken a good look at me, you know I need all the beauty sleep I can get.

In a first for me, my bed sheets were too narrow for the bed, so when you rolled over, you’d scrunch the sheets up and lie directly on the thick plastic mattress cover and then start sweating your box off. You wake up, fight the sheets back into some kind of coverage and try and nod off again.

With the rest of the group setting off on the 4 hour round trip hike to Castro’s
Sierra Maestra mountains HQ and with no water available to shower with, I wandered around the local village near Villa Islazul Santo Domingo with camera in hand. I also to the time to watch 368 Ways To Kill Castro, which reportedly was the amount of known attempts on his life.

The crew got back around 12:45, grabbed a ham & cheese roll and then lined up to be ferried back to our bus waiting about 20 minutes away.

From there it was a 4-hour bus ride into Camagüe and the Melia Hotel Colon, our accommodations for the night. Dinner was held in a local square at the
Restaurante 1800 which is known for it buffet selection.

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SIERRA MAESTRA – Granma, CUB

An early morning rain shower greeted the new day and I ‘d have to say the smell just after rain, is one of the best you can experience. It has a freshness all off its own.

The morning was spent at the Museo 26 de Julio – Moncada Barracks where Fidel Castro first launched his revolution in 1953 – an unmitigated failure in which he barely escaped with his life. Next stop was the Cementerio Santa Ifigenia (Santa Ifigenia Cemetery) which holds the remains of most of Cuba’s founding fiqures and significant people in its history – José Martí , María Magdalena Cabrales Fernández the mother of the nation and just recently Fidel himself.

A quick stop at the original Bacardi Rum Distillery to procure some $80 USD bottles of Santiago de Cuba Metucelen rum for $15 USD on the “Grey Market” at the distillery door and then out to the adjacent Castillo de San Pedro de la Roca, which protected the town from pirates, buccaneers and corsairs like Sir Francis Drake and Captain Henry Morgan.

After a late lunch at the only empanada place in the county – The Melia Hotel, we hit the road for a 3-hour bus ride to our drop off point, where we would take smaller vehicles into our mountain accommodations at Villa Islazul Santo Domingo for the night. The premise being to take a 4-hour roundtrip hike in the morning to Fidel Castro’s mountain Headquarters.

Dinner was a very local affair at a farmers’ place where we were treated to whole roasted pig with rice and vegetables.

With no water at all in our room and an air conditioner that had no controls, other than tripping the main circuit breaker, killing the room lights as well. As the AC was running flat chat in Arctic windstorm mode and as it was colder than a mother in-laws kiss – we turned it off, opened the windows and doors to allow some natural airflow in and to signal the start of the all night mozzie buffet.

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SANTIAGO DE CUBA – Santiago de Cuba, CUB

To say I was a bit dusty this morning would be one hell of an understatement. I climbed on the bus feeling a bit green around the gills and six different shades of shit for the 6½ hour bus ride into Cuba’s second largest city and former capital Santiago de Cuba.

After a late lunch at the Restaurante Hostal Aurora, we took an hour or so to get the orientation walk out of the way, which encompassed visiting the main pedestrian thoroughfare, the oldest cathedral in the city – Santa Basílica Metropolitana Iglesia Catedral, as well as Parque de la Alameda, Céspedes Park and Parque la Placita en Santiago de Cuba before checking into our separate Casa’s.

We all met up around 8:30PM to go visit the city’s only 4 Star hotel – the Iberostar Casa Granda Hotel, to take in the evening skyline and have some dinner.

Imagine my disappointment to wait just over an hour for a cold ½ roast chook, that obviously died of dehydration as it as dry as a bastard calf. The “meal” was accompanied with tinned beans and peas as more of a an after-thought plate filler.

Most of the others decided to continue on to the Casa de La Trova to test out their Salsa steps with the locals, but being close to midnight, I decided to pull up stumps and hit the fart sack.